The Numbers Game

1. 10. 32? What's your magic number?

A few weeks ago a college acquaintance and I met for drinks. Somehow, after a few too many beers, we got around to the topic of partners. And how many. His number was three times mine. He wasn't exactly proud, but I told him for a guy, it's ok. Am I validating the double standard? I think I'm just accepting that few guys will turn down a willing partner. My drinking buddy assured me that since my number was not as high as his, it wasn't bad. But I wondered if he was reassuring me or hoping to add one on to both of our numbers at some point in time.

I won't reveal my number to the masses, but let's just say a few too many drinks and I'm often easily persuaded. I'm not saying I'm easy but I like having a good time. And I think I've had my fair share of one-nighters to boot. But before I get into too much detail, do numbers matter?

If you met someone and they told you their number was 17, would your opinion of them drastically change? 71? What about the make out slut who is still a virgin?

If someone didn't know me, I'm not sure I'd want them knowing my number. But if your new partner tells you their number, would you freak if it was outrageously high? Or low? Or accumulated in a very short period of time? What about emotional attachment? A very low percentage of my number I actually cared about in any way shape or form. Can I discount my number to reflect that?

Another big question is drunk sex. The majority of my partners had me only after I was under the influence. If being drunk doesn't count, my number would drop significantly. And back to emotions, there were zero involved in my drunken escapades. I like to think of drunken one-nighters as a contract of sorts, both parties seeking physical enjoyment consent and it is assumed there will not be cuddling or follow up phone calls.

But if numbers are purely a tally of notches on the bedpost, I guess rationalizing is just a waste of time. Maybe we should just throw numbers out the window and let the past stay in the past. Or use the don't ask, don't tell method? Lie? Who knows.