So the Shy Guy, who has since earned the nickname WIMB (Work Instant Message Boy), and I played this instant message game for months before anything happened. I kid you not: awkward hellos at the coffee bar, random (though rare) flirtation at the gym, and of course - lots of random IMs. I felt like, despite our minimal in-person interactions, we were getting to know each other pretty well.
I could not for my life figure him out though. Why wasn't he asking me out? Asking to hang? Maybe asking for my PHONE NUMBER? ANYTHING?
We exchanged numbers one Thursday night last Spring (2011) when a bunch of work people were at a local bar. He was pretty drunk, and I got some jibberish late night texts. Asking me to come over or something I imagine. I was distracted by a car full of friends forcing me to go through the McDonald's drive-thru.
A month or so passed, and we started playing extremely competitive games of Words with Friends. I backed off on the IMing, but WIMB would essentially narrate every game and comment on every other word I played. One Friday night, I was watching Colby's rabbit and had big plans of watching her DVR and eating a healthy meal. I played a Word after polishing off said healthy dinner, and immediately got a text from WIMB!
what are you doing playing words instead of drinking?
Oh no. I'd been caught. I truthfully said I'd just finished dinner, and tried to figure out how I'd play this. He semi-invited me to go drink with him and his buddy, who'd be leaving soon. I went back and forth on whether I'd accept his half-invitation. Eventually, frustrated with how DAMN long we'd been interacting before the chance of hanging out would come, I drove down. He was clearly even more shitfaced than he'd indicated. So I decided to try and play catch up. At least WIMB is a decent enough human being to pay for drinks. His friend showed up unexpectedly, so I bonded with the friend's 19 year old lady friend. Add this to the list of awkward moments.
So the bar starts closing and I agree to drive WIMB back up the hill to his apartment. Of course I followed him inside, where I saw his assortment of sporting equipment. He had everything from a bike to golf clubs to skis and snowboards and hunting gear and soccer cleats... Sexy. So I grabbed his tri-suit top, threw it on, and had him put on his American-flag print bike jersey. We started making out on his couch, made our way to the bed and... well... I woke up the next morning and let's just say I was no longer rocking the triathlon top. WIMB was sweet that morning, even shutting the blinds when I complained of darkness. We messed around again and snuggled until he determined it was time to get up. I drove him back to his car and we pecked goodbye.
So clearly I was having mixed feelings about this little interaction. But after months and months of miscellaneous banter, I decided it was bound to happen. And to let things run their course. We'd still talk via IM but our in person interactions had not improved. He certainly wasn't asking me out. And I was convinced he'd gotten something from me and was done.
Fast forward to one year later. I still crushed on WIMB pretty hard, but knew he was a lost cause. Cute, but a bit too shy and apparently a closet player! WIMB chatted me up and asked me if I'd play on their local soccer team. I agreed. But it turns out I was never needed. Either way, it sort of re-opened the doors to our virtual flirtation...Luckily since we'd finally exchanged numbers it extended from Work IM to Text Message.
Anyway, I kept my distance but was a bit chattier at the gym with him and decided I'd stop trying to impress him and just be me. I spotted him at a bar another Thursday night. But he didn't see me. So I decided to text him and see what happened.
He expressed disappointment, and thus began another evening of back and forth and inviting me to go to the bar he was at (alone... Alcoholic much?). Anyway, our casual happy hour turned into shots of Jameson with colleagues from across the pond, chugging too many beers and a very late night. WIMB was asking me to go to his apartment. I told Colby and she was all for it, even calling me a taxi since none of us were in any condition to drive.
I arrived, WIMB having left the door open to his apartment building. We immediately started hooking up, but had some minimal conversation. I asked him if he really was that shy - since he was cute and always out and about. He said yes, which to this day I find a bit confusing. He definitely seems to hide behind phone and computer screens and/or use his liquid courage.
Anyway, I refused to have sex with him. He was not too happy about this but I think we enjoyed ourselves anyway. He drove me to the train station and something told me that was the last time we'd enjoy such an interaction. The next day, I was forced to apartment hunt in the same clothes I'd worn to work the day before. Talk about a walk of shame!!!
Rumor has it that now he's sleeping with a married chick, who we shall call the Maneater. And yet I wasn't interesting to him? I've since decided that I was too much for him... I didn't fully give into his charms, after all. I'm smart, fun, and independent. He even thinks I'm athletic. And although I'd sometimes make the first move, I kept a fair distance and tried to be playful... Despite the fact that he was frequently the only guy I found interesting. I realize now that our frequent IM conversations were probably just to pass time during work. They had nothing to do with how awesome or awful I am. I will admit that I still wonder if I could have changed things- would we be dating if I didn't give in almost two years ago? Or would we still just be randomly IMing about biking or drinking? I still think he's adorable and try to walk a bit more confidently when I know he's around.
Here's The Deal...
9 years ago